Hope for Purity - Support for those Wounded

Pornography Use by a Spouse:

Finding out your spouse is using pornography can lead to intense feelings of shock, hurt, anger, and betrayal. Learning the truth about duration of use and the powerful hold pornography has over your loved one’s life can be overwhelming. As painful and confusing as it may be to sort through your feelings, a willingness to learn about the addictive nature of pornography will prove essential to your healing, your spouse’s recovery, and rebuilding of trust within your marriage. This journey will not be easy. Remembering that marriage is a sacrament, knowing that God is an ever-present part of your marriage providing strength, hope, and love, you can find the perseverance to heal. In His time, both you and your spouse will grow stronger individually, as a couple, and in your commitment to a healthy, holy marriage.

Your First Steps

1. Allow God to walk this journey with you
   
   

   Trust is not easy for someone who has been deeply wounded. The Lord understands your pain. Bring to Him your fear, anger, and broken heartedness. Talk with Him daily through prayer and allow His peace and understanding to comfort you in your distress.
   
   

2. Join a support group and/or see a therapist
   
   

   You may be feeling any number of strong emotions or you might just be numb, but you don’t have to be alone. Others have been where you are and have found healing and support. While your spouse seeks out his or her own recovery for pornography addiction, begin your healing journey by considering faith-based, technique-based, or topic-based support groups and/or therapists. You may want to start your search at https://www.catholictherapists.com.

   
   
3. Educate yourself about the addictive nature of pornography
   
   

   Pornography addiction is real, it is powerful, and it damages the addict’s most important intimate relationships. Learning the facts behind pornography’s effects on the human brain will not only educate you on the science behind the addiction, but also open a window into understanding your spouse’s struggle to overcome his or her addiction. Most importantly, you will realize this addiction is not about you, a common misconception for the spouse of a pornography addict. An excellent resource to begin your education is https://reclaimsexualhealth.com/Education-Resources/help-for-a-spouse.html.
   
   

4. Practice self-care
   
   

   Times of distress can affect all aspects of a hurting individual – mental, physical, emotional, and spiritual.  You are worth the time and investment to care for your well-being. Prioritize time in your day for quiet reflection and prayer, extra rest, and physical activity to relieve stress and boost your mood. Surround yourself with supportive family, friends, and new support group members. Practice daily self-affirmations to rebuild confidence and belief in your personal growth and healing.

Online Resources